Upon waking I am still dreaming, searching, imagining, feeling, wanting, running, wishing, aching.  And so to quiet my head, I want to hear someone else’s words and start reading….

“When my eldest son Brendan was born he was placed on my belly and covered with a blanket. . . .After a while the midwife laid him beside me on the bed to examine him, to make sure the proper number of fingers and toes were all in the right places. It was a hot day in July, the room was warm and he was laid on a flannel blanket. But the second he was laid down he screamed and frantically flung out both arms seeking something to hang on to. Physically alone for the first time with only the warm air of the room touching most of his body he was lost in a vast and unfamiliar emptiness. His tiny red fist reached up and grabbed the only thing in his vicinity- the midwife’s long ponytail- and yanked it toward him with amazing strength, pulling her face close to his as if to say, “Don’t leave me alone out here in this nothingness. I don’t like it!”

This is what it is like for us sometimes in the emptiness- terrifying. And we grab at what is available and pull it close to us. Hopefully we have surrounded ourselves with people and places and ideas and practices that that remind us that we belong, that we are always connected to that which sustains life. Otherwise we are left grabbing for things that may lower our anxiety but do so by removing us from ourselves and the world, diminishing our ability to feel pleasure as well as pain.  May we be with it all & reach for what supports us in an open-hearted, curious-minded, body-grounded intention today, particularly in those moments when the vastness within & around us feels a little overwhelming.”

~Oriah Mountain Dreamer

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