Tired, contemplative, especially wistful as I remember my work and Gail now three year’s past.  

wist·ful  [wist-fuhl]  adjective 1. characterized by vague or regretful longing

It was a powerful time. I recall feeling challenged, inspired, nervous, great sadness, love….transformed as I put all my energy into creating a piece to honor, respect, uplift and transcend the grief we all were struggling to overcome so we could embrace who she was. 

The longing I feel is for the compulsion to create…to have that deep passion for creating something meaningful again. It is elusive right now.  I don’t want to just make things, stuff. We have enough meaningless stuff in the world. I know there are many who talk about the need for beauty, respite from our world of fast machines and impersonal digitized connection. I get it, I really do, but I believe where I’ve been and who I’ve become is informed by a need to have beautiful function without waste, needless clutter, stuff for stuff’s sake. It will come, I have to find some patience. And make the time to try. And just listen.